be careful little ears what you hear

    I have issue with people who say that those who sit on these pews "deserve" what they get. As one who sat on a pew in a similar church and was raised by people who were just as aggressive, but without the hugging; I am telling you that the people who sit in these special pews in these special churches really believe that most churches conduct themselves this very way. The people, especially the children,  who grow up in these very special churches really have no idea that they are worthy or special or loved or talented or useful. They have ingested the ideology that they are sick and bad and that they live in a sick and bad world. They cannot "walk away". The brain has been wired to believe that guilt and shame is a way of normal life.
   I don't know if you believe in G-d, and that's not why I'm here. I don't care if you believe in G-d and I certainly am not offended if you believe in a different brand of spirit than I do, but I'm here to tell you this: The first thing I learned about my pagan friends is that they have one rule only. Do No Harm. They are free to live their lives without presuming judgement as long as they don't actively seek to harm anything or anyone. I had never...not in my whole life....ever....even fathomed that I could live and just be kind. Just be myself. Just do good works. Just focus on my relationship with me and my spirit.

    If you believe in G-d please accept my invitation to find a relationship with a loving nurturing G-d who doesn't send mean people to tell you that you are failing at life. And if you don't believe in G-d then please reach out to your friends and relatives who are being verbally and emotionally abused by people who think that they can speak for G-d and commit emotional blackmail on their congregants.

   I am emotionally drained and am having anxiety. I see a fetal position in my future after my kids go to bed.  If you were raised in a place like this, forgive me if this brings you pain. I feel your pain. I am bruised and broken even right now remembering all the  times I was called out, humiliated, shamed and scorned.
   I love you. I trust you. But I will never send my kids to church with you even on VBS night because I don't know what happens in that sanctuary of yours. And sadly, the beauty that I see in your heart does not deserve to be abused in this way on Sunday morning. I did not sit on a naughty bench of a pew for many months and thankfully I never took my kids to a church that allowed this sort of action. This behavior is nothing short of a Jim Jones meltdown when he stood on the Bible proclaiming his worth.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSJt-LHMNRY&feature=youtu.be