Hiding Behind Pretty

   There has been so much press and chit chat recently about the Dove ad campaign that features women describing what they look like. I want to share my thoughts on what this ad has done for me.

   What the Dove campaign has taught me is that we (women) don't take into account what we have going on inside of us when we are trying to factor our pretty quotient. Where we see all of our wrinkles and imperfections, other people (even other women) see our light, our energy, our strength. What we feel really shows through our eyes and our smile. When we feel happy it radiates through us and makes us much more attractive. In other words, it makes us accessible and likeable.
    So how has Dove changed my mind about women? I am giving myself a challenge. I want to no longer tell you that you are pretty. Getting told that you are pretty makes all women feel good, okay; but pretty is so subjective. I want to tell you that you are smart. I want to tell you that you scare me with your rock star attributes. I want to tell you that you are fashionable. I want to tell you that you are courageous. I want to tell you that you are thoughtful and genuine. I want us to have a relationship that tests how well I know you so that if we meet in public I can say something more than, "Oh you look so pretty today." I realize how vapid that sounds. I know how pretty my girlfriends are, and I am not going to lie I may send you an e-mail just to tell you how beautiful you are, but in real life I want us to recognize that we are more than just clothes hangers and make-up ads. I love you. I want to tell you why I love you, and it's not just because you land high on someone else's pretty scale.

    Also, let me add this. The woman that you want to be -you are already her. You are just hiding her behind pain, sorrow, depression, and  exhaustion. She is there. She requires work. She requires encouragement. She requires sweat. She requires love. If you want to be a better you, if you want to be a brighter shade of you, then be it. It will take time, but you deserve to be whatever you want to be. It makes no difference if you feel 22 or 42, what matters is that you FEEL and that you are opening up to the world and letting them see you. What matters is that you express yourself.  When the world sees the inside of you, they will stop calling you "pretty" and they will start calling you "that girl I want to be."